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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25912309">suggestive drunken absurdity</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/abhorsenbranwen/pseuds/abhorsenbranwen'>abhorsenbranwen</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>shenanigans [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Drunken Flirting, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Summer Vacation, Unresolved Sexual Tension, there's only one bed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 02:41:41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,013</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25912309</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/abhorsenbranwen/pseuds/abhorsenbranwen</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p></p><div>
  <p>victoire, fred, and co get very drunk in their friend's bedroom right after they get home for the summer.</p>
</div>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Victoire Weasley/Original Male Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>shenanigans [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2277989</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>shenanigans and beyond</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>suggestive drunken absurdity</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The nice thing about summer vacation after fifth year wasn't just that Victoire and her friends weren't just old enough for their parents to leave them relatively unsupervised - that had been the case for at least a year. It was that now her friend Gallagher's sister Gillian was both old enough to buy them beer and feeling guilty enough about imminently moving out to do so.</p><p>He was doing an excellent job at pretending that he wasn't already feeling lonely. Victoire was far from convinced that that was genuinely how he felt, but he'd always been a good actor.</p><p>They'd all been home for just over a week when the five of them gathered in his room for a night of drinking and being ridiculous, on the grounds that it was both by far the biggest and the most private. His four oldest siblings had long since finished school and moved out, and with only him and Gillian left at home, his father had just shrugged his assent the previous summer when Gallagher had announced that he wanted to relocate to the now rarely-used family room on the ground floor.</p><p>Victoire and her cousin Fred had privately speculated that Mr. Dedworth was probably just as happy to have two floors between his ability to get a decent night's sleep and his son's very loud friends.</p><p>The five of them were far from sober when the conversation took a turn toward the gutter, which was about par for the course.</p><p>"Micah, if you <em>really</em> want something to gossip about, we could always go hook up in Gallagher's bathroom," Lexy Abbott said. The bruise on her collarbone from a quaffle save during the last quidditch game of the year was still on full display under her bright yellow tank top. "It's really just how I dreamed my first time would be - in my friend's bathroom with some guy who won't stop lording his knowledge of muggle stuff over us."</p><p>"Some guy?" Micah Higgins shot back. His shirt today had a symbol on the front and the words <em>everything changed when the fire nation attacked</em> on the back. Victoire had no idea what that meant, which was generally a pretty good indication that it did indeed have something to do with muggle stuff. "I'm fucking <em>hurt,</em> Lex. I'm more than just some guy - I'm some guy with <em>just</em> enough class to not fuck anyone in my friend's bathroom."</p><p><em>"Just</em> enough, huh? Sounds like a close call." Fred held his hand out. Like Lexy, he still sported several bruises from the quidditch game, though only the one on his calf was actually visible just then. "G, how <em>would</em> you feel about your friends hooking up in your bathroom?"</p><p>Gallagher handed Fred a bottle and shrugged as Fred popped the top off and took a swig. "Hey, as long as you wash your hands and don't make me listen to it, go have your seven minutes of heaven."</p><p>"Bold of you to suggest Micah would last seven minutes."</p><p>"Hey!" Micah tossed an empty chocolate frog box at Lexy. <em>"I</em> was going to make that joke!"</p><p>"I love that <em>that's</em> your objection, not that she said it in the first place," Victoire told him.</p><p>"Mocking me is fine," her fellow Ravenclaw said. "But stealing my joke? That's un-fucking-forgivable. I can't hook up with someone who steals my jokes." Lexy collapsed into a fit of giggles, burying her face in the arm of the chair she'd taken over earlier that night. "Fred, Gallagher, either of you want to get lucky?"</p><p>Fred let out a snort, and Gallagher pretended to consider it. "It's not that it's not <em>really</em> tempting," he said. "It's just that I'm not at all tempted." Victoire started to giggle, too, and he grinned at her. "How's it feel to be the last resort, Vic?"</p><p>"I think <em>you</em> were the last resort," she told him. "Micah doesn't want his three minutes in heaven with me."</p><p>Gallagher glanced back at Micah, looking a little perplexed about why Victoire was being left out of something that was clearly a joke in the first place. "My sister and I have a rule," Micah said. "We don't joke about fucking the same people. She joked about Vic first, and I'm pretty sure it's some kind of crime to break a sacred vow like that."</p><p>Victoire stuck her tongue out at Fred as a smirk spread across his face. They'd all spent an evening at Micah's over the previous Christmas break, and Fred had teased her later about Micah's muggle sister wanting to hook up with her. She'd stolen the stuffed purple unicorn that he regularly insisted that he really had outgrown and refused to give it back until he stopped teasing her, but he'd had the last laugh when Micah had confirmed it after they'd gotten back to school.</p><p>"Your sister made a joke about wanting to fuck Vic?" Gallagher sounded bizarrely bewildered by the concept.</p><p>Micah shrugged. "I mean, I don't know that it was <em>entirely</em> a joke, but yeah."</p><p>Victoire twisted around to nudge her friend, who was sitting next to her on the couch. <em>"Yeah,</em> G, some people actually find me attractive."</p><p>He rolled his eyes at her. "Yeah, I'd gathered that, I just can't fathom <em>why."</em> There was a general chorus of laughter as she shoved him playfully again. He grinned and put an arm around her shoulders. "Oh, Vic, ignore me - it's just my jealousy talking. I can't <em>stand</em> knowing that I'll never be the hottest person in the room if you're also in it. It's been keeping me up at night."</p><p>"Oh my <em>god,</em> Gallagher," she said, shifting to lean against him. "How are you such a fucking dick?"</p><p>"Practice makes perfect, and I practice at being a dick a lot," he told her. "Oh, come on, Vic, am I just your fucking pillow now?"</p><p>"You're so much more than my pillow," she told him. "You're also my distillery. Give me another."</p><p>He popped the top off and handed it to her, and Lexy rolled her eyes. "She tells you that you're just a dick and a pillow to her, and <em>she's</em> the one who gets her top popped off?" Micah let out a loud snort of laughter, and she threw the empty box back at him. "Oh my <em>god,</em> Micah."</p><p>"Oh, come on, Lex," Fred put in. He was also laughing. "That one's not on him, that's on you."</p><p>Before Lexy could do more than shrug an acknowledgement of that, Gallagher said, "She also called me her <em>distillery,</em> which I'm choosing to take it as a compliment. That's what it was, right, Vic?"</p><p>"Sure, baby," she said, matching his sarcasm. "Absolutely."</p><p>The two of them went upstairs a couple hours later to get some water and a quick snack; when they returned fifteen minutes later, all three of their friends were asleep. Fred was sprawled out on the couch, snoring slightly, and Micah and Lexy had both fallen asleep in their armchairs.</p><p>That was a little unfortunate. When they'd all stayed at Gallagher's over the previous summer, the unspoken assumption had always been that Victoire and Fred would share the bed - it saved repeated conversations about who got the bed on each specific occasion and any awkwardness about whether any particular permutation of the group <em>did</em> feel weird.</p><p>But that was clearly not an option just then.</p><p>Gallagher glanced from the couch and chairs to his bed. "I mean - uh -"</p><p>She waved a hand at him. "G, it's <em>fine,</em> I can just go home - I can fake sober for long enough to get past my parents."</p><p>He brushed his hair back from his face, looking skeptical. "Vic, as somebody who's definitely more sober than you right now, I'm really not so sure about that."</p><p>"Well, <em>I'm</em> sure."</p><p>Victoire really <em>was</em> sure. Being <em>correct</em> was clearly a different story, though: she collapsed into a fit of giggles as soon as they entered the floo room.</p><p>Her friend sat down next to her, a broad grin on his face. "Yeah," he said. "Yeah, I can tell that you're totally going to be able to fake being sober."</p><p>A new fit of giggles overtook her, and she buried her face in his knee. "Sorry," she gasped, and she heard him start to laugh.</p><p>"Come on," he said when she'd started to regain her composure. "Just crash here so you don't get in trouble - I don't mind sleeping on the floor if it's weird."</p><p>She'd gotten her giggles under control but very pointedly did not sit up to look at him; she was sure that her face was nearly as red as her hair. She wasn't sure why it was making her blush - there was no reason why it <em>should.</em> She and Gallagher were friends - they'd never been anything <em>but</em> friends. There was no reason why this should be a big deal.</p><p>But somehow, she felt a little weird anyway.</p><p>"No," she said, straightening up and hoping he'd assume the redness in her face came from laughing or alcohol rather than whatever other nonsensical emotions she might or might not be feeling. "No, don't be silly - it's fine."</p><p>He pushed himself to his feet and held out his hand. "Let's go get some more water first, though - I don't really need to know what a hangover feels like."</p><p>When they got back to his room, he crawled into bed and settled in, legs crossed and back against his headboard. She flopped down next to him on her stomach and immediately made a discovery. "G, I don't think I'm actually <em>tired."</em></p><p>"Neither am I," he said as she edged closer to him. "Uh - Vic, that's my <em>knee."</em></p><p>"I know," she said, turning her head to look up at him. "Do you mind?"</p><p>He shook his head, looking a little bemused. "No, it's - I don't <em>mind,</em> I just can't imagine that it's a comfortable pillow."</p><p>She wrapped her arms around his leg. "All of you is a good pillow." The corners of his mouth twitched, and she groaned. "Oh my god, don't say it!"</p><p>"Well, now I don't need to - you basically said it for me." After a moment, she felt his fingers in her hair, and she let out a moan. "Oh, should I stop?" he teased. "It sounds like you're not enjoying this <em>at all."</em></p><p>"Oh my god, don't you dare," she breathed, tightening her grip as though that had any impact on what he was doing with his hands. "This feels so <em>good.</em> <em>Yes,</em> I heard it, shut up and keep touching me."</p><p>He started to twine her hair around his fingers. "You're making it way too easy for me, Vic," he said lightly. "It doesn't even feel sporting to make fun of you. Here, put this under your head - there's no way that that's comfortable."</p><p>She took the pillow he was offering her without protest. "This feels so good," she said, closing her eyes as her scalp started to tingle. "It's like an orgasm on my head. Like, the good kind. Stop rolling your eyes at me!"</p><p>He was laughing at her again. "I'm almost impressed that you could tell that I was through the orgasm I'm apparently giving your head."</p><p>She closed her eyes. "Oh, <em>fuck,</em> that feels so good."</p><p>The bemusement had given way to more straightforward amusement. "When you start dating somebody, I am <em>definitely</em> going to bring this up."</p><p>"Good." She didn't open her eyes - the sensations that had started cascading down her spine felt too good for her to let anything else distract her. "Give them pointers - this feels really good."</p><p>"Sure," her friend said. She felt his other hand sink into her hair, too, and she let out a whimper. "I'll definitely give the next person you date pointers about how to make you moan with pleasure. That won't be awkward at <em>all."</em></p><p>As soon as he'd stopped and laid down next to her, she threw her arms around him. "Thanks," she said in his chest. "You're a really good friend."</p><p>"Yeah," he said softly, returning the hug. "You are, too." She made an annoyed noise when he pulled back. "What?"</p><p>"I like you hugging me," she said as he studied her face. "You have nice arms."</p><p>He rolled his eyes and pulled her back toward him. "Vic, you're a <em>very</em> affectionate drunk."</p><p>He still sounded amused rather than annoyed, so she nuzzled her face into his shirt. She registered how soft the cotton was, and then immediately realized something else. "You have a nice chest, too," she said, ignoring what he'd said. "Do you work out and I just somehow never noticed?"</p><p>"I dunno," he said after a moment. "Sometimes when I'm stressed, I guess. I mean, there's no reason why you <em>would</em> notice - it's not like there's generally a reason for me to take my shirt off around you."</p><p>"That's true," she conceded. "Well, when there <em>is</em> someone you take your shirt off for, they'll be very lucky."</p><p>He let out a snort of laughter. "Vic, you haven't actually <em>seen</em> me without a shirt on in more than a year. I don't think you can say that one way or the other."</p><p>"Well, I can <em>tell."</em> He was looking skeptical again, and she blew out her breath in exasperation. "Oh my <em>god,</em> G, fine, take off your shirt then."</p><p>It occured to her belatedly that if any of their friends woke up and found Gallagher taking off his clothes, they'd probably have some questions. On the other hand, though, now she was curious.</p><p>As it often did, curiosity won out. "Come <em>on,</em> Gallagher."</p><p>He sighed and yanked his shirt over his head. "I'm only doing this because I'm pretty sure you'll be too drunk to remember," he told her. "And Vic, if you make fun of me, you're sleeping on the floor."</p><p>She dragged her eyes away from his chest to study his face. To her surprise, he looked serious. "G, why the fuck would I make fun of you? I wouldn't do that to my friend - not like <em>that,</em> that's just mean."</p><p>He shrugged. "I don't know. I don't usually take my shirt off in front of people - especially not so they can tell me whether or not I'm attractive - so I'm self-conscious. You're also very drunk - I'm not sure you'd be able to lie convincingly even if you wanted to."</p><p>If she'd been uncertain about whether he'd sobered up significantly more than she had, his ability to come up with that entire string of logic would have convinced her. The most she could manage was a very simple, "Why would I make fun of you for being hot? That doesn't even make sense."</p><p>He was silent for a moment. "So that's your conclusion?" She wasn't sure what the expression on her face was, but judging by the faint blush on his cheeks, it had convinced him. She started running a finger down his chest, and he stiffened. Before she could pull back, he said, "No! You just - that tickled, that's all. It's fine if you want to feel me up."</p><p>This was something that she was fairly certain she should stop, especially since even through the haze of alcohol, she wasn't sure that she believed that his reaction had been about feeling tickled. On the other hand, though, whatever the reaction had been, he <em>did</em> seem to like what she was doing, so she went back to running her hand across it. His chest was toned in a subtle but noticeable way, and the feel of his muscles under her fingers was almost electric. With a start, she realized that the muscles in his arms were similar - she had no idea how she hadn't noticed <em>that</em> before.</p><p>"You have a nice chest," she repeated after a minute. "Whoever you start taking your shirt off for will be very lucky."</p><p>"Thanks." He glanced over toward their sleeping friends. "Vic, on second thought, if somebody wakes up and catches you doing this, they're gonna have questions."</p><p>Now she did pull her hand back. "Oh, right," she said, feeling her face start to get warm, too. "I - sorry."</p><p>He yanked his shirt back over his head. "No, Vic, it's really fine - next time you're the only one here, I'll take off my shirt again and you can feel me up as much as you want."</p><p>She stuck her tongue out at him. Her heart was starting to race - she wanted to write it off to the drinking, though she suspected that it might have more to do with realizing what her friend looked like without a shirt on than how many beers she'd had. She hoped that he was right and she <em>was</em> too drunk to properly remember this - the last thing she wanted was to make Gallagher uncomfortable by developing some kind of crush on him.</p><p>He grinned at her and nudged her side. "Vic, seriously - it's <em>fine.</em> Come here." She felt his arms around her again, and she closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around his neck.</p><p>"You're good at hugging," she murmured. "And you really <em>do</em> have a nice chest."</p><p>She felt him start to shake with barely-suppressed laughter. "Thanks," he said. "While we're complimenting body parts, those shorts make your legs look amazing."</p><p>"Thanks," she said, ignoring the lurch in her stomach. Since she wasn't looking at his face, she managed to blurt out, "But I don't have a nice chest?" When he didn't respond immediately, she said, "Sorry - I don't know what's -"</p><p>"No - I just - didn't want to go there and make you feel weird." She could hear his heart starting to speed up. "But since you asked, yes, Vic, you have an amazing chest." She felt his lips brush against her forehead, and a pleasant sensation started to run across her shoulders and down her back again. "Now stop apologizing," he said softly, letting her go. "Come on - if you roll onto your stomach, I'll play with your hair until you fall asleep."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>victoire was indeed too drunk to remember this. gallagher was not. this'll pick back up in shenanigans.</p><p>kudos/comments are always super appreciated &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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